Kowhai Counselling
  • Home
  • About Me
  • Safe Practice
  • Modalities
  • Resources
    • Coping Skills >
      • Breathing
      • Fast stress reduction techniques
      • Grounding Skills
      • Progressive Muscle Relaxation
    • Psychometrics
    • Sexual Violence
    • Understanding Myself >
      • Crisis Plan
      • Intuitive Eating
      • Sensory Needs
      • Unhelpful Thinking Styles
  • Contact

Communication

Everyone experiences communication difficulties from time to time. It can be difficult to figure out what our needs are and to communicate these effectively to another person in a way that is understood and interpreted accurately. 

What is communication?
Communication is the way in which we convey how relate to each other. This can be through face to face interactions, written information or over the internet and social media. Words only make up a small part of our communication - most of the communication we receive is through non-verbal understanding of body language, and our own interpretation of the information being received. 



​How do people experience communication troubles?
In it's most basic form, communication is a message sent to a receiver who then interprets the message to make meaning of it. Your communication style helps determine whether the receiver understands the message you intended. 
Communication breakdowns happen when the message is misinterpreted by the receiver. This can be because of 'noise' which contributes to the misunderstanding. Noise, in this sense, is all the invisible information that shapes and forms how we perceive and understand the message. Noise can be literal and physical, such as choosing to try to have an important conversation in an inappropriate environment. Noise can also be emotional. It is fed by our own sense of importance or inadequacy which then nurtures uncomfortable emotions that can shape how we 'hear' the message. 

What can I do to cope with communication troubles?
Communication needs to take place under optimal conditions in order for the message to be received most accurately. This might mean speaking with the person you want to communicate with and setting up a time and space where you can both attend to the conversation. It might mean setting up 'rules for engaging' so that the conversation takes place in a safe space and there is clarity around what options are available if either person is feeling uncomfortable in any way. It might be that you check in with the other person to see if you are accurately hearing the message they are trying to convey. 
If you are open and honest about how you are experiencing the conversation, and are clear about what your needs within the conversation are, then you can be reasonably sure you are being true to yourself. 

How can I help a friend or loved one experiencing communication difficulties?

Acknowledging the other person is essential to build connection. Being able to recognise where they are emotionally and identifying how better to resolve their unmet needs within the conversatoin. Check in with the person to see that you are understanding and interpreting what they say accurately, and in the way that they are wishing to convey to you; and if you have misinterpreted what is meant, be open to listening and hearing what they are trying to say. 

If I come to counselling, how might that help with communication?
Picture
Here are some other common reasons people attend counselling. Click to find out more about them:
Anxiety
Communication
Depression
Disordered eating
Emotional abuse
Exam and study stress
Grief
Physical abuse
PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)
Relationships
Self-esteem and confidence
Self-harm / Self-injury
Sexual abuse
Stress management
Study support
Suicidal thoughts and feelings
Trauma
Picture
www.kowhaicounselling.com
  • Home
  • About Me
  • Safe Practice
  • Modalities
  • Resources
    • Coping Skills >
      • Breathing
      • Fast stress reduction techniques
      • Grounding Skills
      • Progressive Muscle Relaxation
    • Psychometrics
    • Sexual Violence
    • Understanding Myself >
      • Crisis Plan
      • Intuitive Eating
      • Sensory Needs
      • Unhelpful Thinking Styles
  • Contact